Refuse to be Passive

Stuck in Limbo

In Uncategorized on November 10, 2011 at 8:02 pm

There are few things more frustrating than being in limbo—the uncomfortable state of waiting that a person occasionally finds one self in. You find yourself wondering what the future holds, but the only message you receive is “hold on,” “wait,” “I’ll know for you by Monday.” It’s at those moments that you feel life has stopped. Decisions have to be made, but at the same time, without answers to your questions, decisions can’t be made. It’s a point at which it’s tempting to sit down with a big bowl of popcorn and start working your way through the first season of Castle. As you may have guessed by this point, that uncomfortable waiting game is being lived out by me as we speak. The first term of courses is nearly finished, with finals coming next week. After that is a bit up in the air. I may have a course starting immediately, however, if there are inadequate course registrations, then the course will be postponed until January, leaving me with a seven week gap between the end of my program and the beginning of the next. The question becomes, what to do? Do I look for a way to go home to Alberta for those seven weeks? Do I stick around Toronto and try to land a job? Could I do freelance cooking or baking in Alberta or Toronto? Is there a market for it in either locations? Do I apply for an unpaid internship to try to gain some experience? The questions keep building. I know that making money over this time is fairly important if I plan to have the entire program paid for by the time I finish, but what form that will take is up in the air. I don’t currently have a job, and if freelance falls through, then a more standard work arrangement will need to occur. That in itself is inconvenient, because my class schedule is never consistent for more than three months at a time. I can promise an employer a standard schedule for a semester or a year. Life just doesn’t work like that right now. So until I know if my program is running, I can’t really make any decisions surrounding life beyond next Saturday. Next Saturday isn’t so far off. It’s a little nerve wracking really, to be stuck in this limbo. But what’s a girl to do? Blog I suppose.


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