Refuse to be Passive

Pefectionist Tendencies

In Uncategorized on February 10, 2011 at 4:09 pm

I was reading about perfectionism today and the way that it can actually drive a wedge in between us and others. The desire to be perfect, to always be striving for more, can leave others feeling inferior, angry, depressed, and annoyed– particularly if they don’t share perfectionist tendencies.

Our culture is constantly telling us that we have to get it right, but have you ever actually met someone who seemed to have it right? I’ll bet if you have, you don’t like them.

For example, there was a girl who I went to high school with, she was beautiful, athletic, smart (grades in the high 90s), gracious, kind, and an all around gem. I couldn’t help but like her, and I hated her for it. Not very generous, I know. Good thing I don’t claim perfection.

As I read this section of writing on perfectionism, a movie scene popped into my head. It was from Two Weeks Notice with Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant. While the movie may not have been award material, I think they’re both rather fabulous actors. Anyway, there’s a scene where the two main characters have it out. George Wade, the rich yet helpless boss of Lucy, a brilliant yet inflexible lawyer, yells something along the lines of, “You’re too perfect! No one wants to live with a saint!” And with that, he sums up what is wrong with her. She’s so rigid and righteous that people find her frustrating and intimidating. Heaven forbid they screw up around her! Which brings me to another Sandra Bullock movie in which she also plays an uptight individual– The Proposal. Strange how she still manages to get the guy at the end of the movies though, no? They always seem to melt her cold, perfectionist heart.

Perfectionists can be intimidating and hard to relate to, but they can also be perfectly lovely people. If you are not a perfectionist, give them the benefit of the doubt. If you are a perfectionist, give the rest of us the benefit of the doubt.

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