Refuse to be Passive

Desire and Achievement

In Life in General on September 17, 2010 at 7:55 pm

I think one of the things that I love about good TV is that the characters always have a burning deisre to achieve something, and they’ll do what they have to to make it happen. I have often imagined caring about something that much, but the truth of the matter is that I don’t. I don’t really care about anything so much that I’d twist my life around to achieve it. Maybe my life has been to easy. Maybe my struggles really aren’t all that. Maybe if I had something truly important to overcome, I’d be doing it right now, instead of writing a post on my blog.

What is it to care about something so much that your drive and desire just don’t fade? I’m really good at starting stuff, but sustaining change is a tough thing to do. I need a reason to do it, and right now, it’s just not there. Now, I’m not meaning to wish suckiness on my life, but I do wonder what my catalyst for change would have to be before I’d take up a mantel and carry it any distance. I would need something to work towards, something to keep me focused. And it would have to be bigger than myself. I have no issues with letting myself down. I suppose that for me, it should be God, my faith. I’ve become to comfortable with me and God, to the point of it being dangerous I suppose. I don’t live life drastically on the edge because my faith demands it of me. I’ve taken a dangerous faith and watered it down until it barely resembles the striking image it’s meant to portray. How did I get to this place? How do I get back to what I was created to be? How do I stop being okay with letting myself down, and start holding myself accountable? How?

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